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The reasons for being alone

Being alone

Attachment theory can play an important role in many relationship problems. In the 1950s, psychologist John Bowlby was the first to explain how people had secure bonds with several important figures throughout their lives.

Think of it this way: If someone cares about you and takes care of them, you are more likely to survive and maintain your genes.

You can see the remnants of attachment theory in everyday life. It begins in early childhood, when you are addicted to a caregiver for all your physical and emotional needs.

If the relationship is reliable and polite, the child is more likely to turn into a safe adult. If the caregiver is irregular or unable to meet the child’s needs, the child may be indifferent to the attachment figure (avoided) or try to contact their caregivers desperately with remarkable behaviors such as crying or screaming (anxious).

In romantic relationships, attachment styles pass from the caregiver / parent to the partner.

Securely connected, easily connects and nurtures in relationships; gives confidence to their interests, responds to communication in a timely manner, makes thoughtful time and plans together. They approach their partners with compassion and kindness.

Anxious people will worry about their partners and try to stay close to them. He may need to communicate with his partners a lot to avoid over-thinking. It can demand excessive trust against its partners. They tend to misunderstand a partner’s behavior as signs of indifference.

Independents will try to maintain their independence, but they can often seem to want something more. They generally show imbalanced behavior.

And when all these people fill the dating pool together without any awareness of their or others’ attachment styles, there can be a lot of chaos and confusion in relationships.

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